The Price We Pay to Protect Those We Love
by The Devils Queen
Summary: When Emily tried to protect JJ Ian Doyal to find out she was alive she didn't plan to come back from the dead only to fall into the hands of human traffickers, and she really didn't expect to fall in love with her rescuer Calleigh Duquesne. When Natalia ran away from Nick, she didn't expect JJ to ever forgive her let alone love her. Warning: Domestic Violence, violence, femslash,
1. Prologue

**A/N:**_ I've done the best I can to create a logical timeline for the past. I know where this story is going so they should be quick updates also I may eventually turn this prologue into a prequel story, but for now this is as much about the past as you need to know_

**Warning:** _Domestic Violence, violence, fem slash,_

"Jen! help! Jen, he's going to kill me," Natalia's voice cracked over the phone line. I was out of bed without thinking, I didn't bother to change clothes all I did was grab my gun off the nightstand and run to my car. All I can think about is Nat, my best friend outside the BAU the girl I would do anything for. She and I went to college and grad school together a long time ago we were roommates until she met Nick, he was a bad boy I had never liked him but I had thought back then she would leave him. She hadn't left him she'd married him, I'd been her maid of honor, but really her wedding day was the day I had lost my best friend. There were no more girls nights, because he may need her, I wasn't allowed to come over after five pm because he could come home, even though he spent most nights at the bar. Rather than applying to the FBI academy with me like we always promised she got a job as a lab tech because Nick didn't want her field trained. I wasn't even paying attention to the road as I sped toward her house. The first time Nick had hit her she'd used her ID to get into Quantico and sneak into my academy room, she'd cried all night in my arms and I'd told her to leave him, she hadn't. I skidded to a stop outside her house and lept out, realizing I wasn't even wearing shoes when I felt the grass beneath my feet.

"You're whore can't save you Natalia you belong to me what is it going to take for you to get that threw you head? Do I have to split it open? Answer me bitch," I could hear Nick yelling as I opened the front door. I took the safety off my glock and cleared the entry way.

"Nick! Please! I know that I belong to you! Please Nick you…" Natalia's pleas was cut off by a scream that made my blood run cold. I forgot about protocol and ran straight toward the sound. As I cleared the top of the stairs the scream stopped abruptly. I got to their bedroom I could see why she had stopped scream Nick had his belt wrapped around her throat and was dragging her by it.

"Freeze!" I yelled leveling my gun on Nick. He froze and lifted his hands as if to surrender while not letting go of the belt Natalia was still on the ground so the movement choked her more, "Let her go," I moved across the room toward them.

"Make me," He growled, I moved my gun to a one handed grip so I could reach my left hand out toward Nat. I realized then that I didn't have any cuffs so I kept the gun pointed at him. When I was close enough to touch Nat I reached for the belt.

"I will shoot you dead if you don't drop it," I hissed at him. He did, I reached down to try to get it off Nat, it was a rookie mistake, he ripped the gun from my hand,I turned on him but it was too late I felt the gun hit my skull before he tossed it aside. My vision swam for a moment and Nick Kicked Natalia till she lay face down on the ground.

"You think your whore can save you Nat? Maybe I should teach her a lesson or two when I'm done with you?" He stepped one foot onto her arm just below the shoulder. I heard sirens in my head as I tried to focus on standing and fighting, but all I could do was stare in horror as he grabbed her wrist, "This is what happens when you go running to your whore," I knew the words were directed at her, but he looked me in the the eye as he jerked up in her wrist. I heard the bones break a millisecond before she screamed.

"You bastard!" I yelled throwing myself at him I felt my shoulder make contact with his stomach. I dropped into a combat stance as he stumbled back tripping over a laundry basket. He reached out for the window to brace himself but he must have broken it earlier because their was no glass and he fell threw it. I glanced out the window to see him lying at least ten feet below not moving, I could also see flashing red and blue lights at the end of the street. I ran to Natalia kneeling beside her running my fingers threw her hair.

"It hurts, Jen, please it hurts," she was sobbing having rolled onto her side and curled into a ball with her arm sticking awkwardly behind her.

"I know sweetheart, It's going to be ok," I cooed to her as I gently lifter her into my lap peppering her forehead with kisses. She whimpered cuddling closer to me, I knew that the neighbors must have called the cops so I didn't try to get out of the house, I just held her and waited.

That was how they found us ten minutes later, I showed them my hands told them who I was and that I wanted to stay with Natalia, they let me. When we got to the hospital I called Hotch and told him what had happened. Natalia's arm was broken in five place but they managed to set it without surgery. Natalia ran off to work in Miami, Nick went away for five years domestic violence, and filed an excessive force complaint against me. I don't know how at the, but Emily made the complaint go away, now if I could turn back the clock I would take the complaint over the price for it going away.


	2. The Girl in the Glades

**A/N:**_ so I realized there where a whole bunch of typo's in the prologue so I'm sorry. I think this is better edited than that was. Also this is supposed to be a happy fic but the beginning is a bit darker than I may have originally planned, but I promise happiness soon._

I had been cautious driving in the Everglades ever since I had been run off the road. My skin was crawling as I headed out to the crime scene, I was driving too slowly eyes scanning the area like a scared animal.

"Cal, calm down we can go a little bit faster," Eric's voice was soft from the passenger seat but he sounded annoyed.

"I'm sorry Eric I'm a little freaked after the last time," I snapped eyes still scanning the area.

"Then let me drive, cause at this rate Calleigh we'll never make it there," Eric said.

"Fine you want..." I saw something off the side of the road a ways it was hanging in a tree, I probably wouldn't have noticed if I hadn't been so jumpy. I stopped the hummer and got out.

"Thank god," I heard Eric grumble as he walked toward the drivers side. I squinted through the trees as hard as I could, I couldn't make out what I was looking at but I could tell it didn't belong. I started walking toward it trying to make out what it was.

"Calleigh what are you doing I thought you were going to let me drive?" I heard Eric yell.

"Eric do you see that red blur about three hundred yards in?" I asked.

"Cal, it's probably just an animal lets go," Eric said.

"No Eric it's hanging from the tree and it's big like human size big," I was yelling now almost seventy five yards in, what ever it was it was hanging from one of the more sturdy trees and it was covered in blood.

"Calleigh we don't have time for this," Eric's voice seemed to be getting closer like he had decided to follow me. I could make out different colors in some places. It looked like someone strung up by their hands, but that was just my morbid mindset, right? I picked up the pace.

"Eric it's human," I hollered at him, letting my walk turn to a flat out run as I realized my morbid mind was right. I could here Eric on the radio behind me as I cleared the last few feet. Long black hair was matted with dried blood, most of her naked body was covered in cracked red, but some of the blood was wet.

"We've got a dead body three hundred yards off the road," Eric spoke into the radio. The body moaned, I jumped almost two feet back.

"Eric she's alive!" I yelled, he dropped the radio then and ran to me.

"It's going to be alright, I'm going to get you out of here," I says gently, "Eric cut the rope where it's anchored to the tree." I stepped as close to her as I could she was hanging by her wrists only a few inches off the ground, but she was taller than me so I braced to catch her. I saw Eric cut the rope and she fell into my arms. She whimpered at the contact but made no attempt to stand on her own.

"Calleigh she's not in good shape, we should try to get her back to the hummer," Eric reasoned, "let me carry her you run ahead and get the first aid kit."

"No...no... Please I... I don't want it," a very soft voice whimpered beside my ear.

"It's alright we're cops we are just going to make sure you're ok, now what's your name?" I soothed, as Eric got closer.

"Come on, let me take her Calleigh," he said. I felt her hand tighten around the collar of my shirt as if she was holding on, I knew the signs.

"Hey she doesn't seen to comfortable with you, why don't you let me take her and you go get a med kit and see if you can get Alexx to leave the crime scene and come look at her," I told him, thankfully he did as I asked, "There we go, no more boy, now why don't you tell me your name?" I put my left arm under her knees and lifted, once I was sure I had ahold of her I begun the trek back to the hummer.

"I... I don't know... Lauren Reynolds... Died in a car crash, Emily Prentiss... Died on the table," she sounded frantic and confused. It was an odd thing to say, but she said it like she had said it over and over again.

"Well, I'm Lieutenant Duquesne but you can call me Calleigh, what can I call you?" I tried again. She was starting to feel heavy and we were barely a third of the way back.

"Lauren Reynolds; died in a car crash, Emily Prentiss; died on the table, Valhalla killed her," the woman's voice was getting stronger.

"Ok, so who is Lauren Reynolds?" I asked hoping if she kept talking it would give me something to go on since she wasn't giving me her name.

"Lauren Reynolds, an arms dealer who loved Valhalla when they lived in Tuscany Lauren Reynolds died in a car crash," she told me. I could see Alexx's ME van pull up next to the hummer, but I focused more on the woman in my arms. She seemed to be in better physical condition than I had first assumed.

"Ok but what about you? Did you see the crash? Did you know Lauren?" I asked hoping to get a little more information, she wasn't telling me her name but if I could figure out where Lauren Reynolds and Emily Prentiss fit into the picture maybe I could find out who this woman was, and how she'd ended up beaten bloody hanging from a tree in the Everglades

"No, they just told me, Lauren Reynolds; died in a car crash, Clyde said it was over, but it wasn't he said he would take away everything I loved, Emily Prentiss; died on the table, he killed her and he won," I was two thirds of the way back, and could feel my muscles aching my arms were starting to shake but I kept going.

"So you loved Emily?" I asked

"Yes...No...Not like you think… I think the drugs are fading I may be able to walk, why don't you let me try to walk? You can't keep trying to carry me you'll hurt yourself," it wasn't what I expected, but I needed the break. I stopped walking and lowered her feet to the ground keeping my arm around her waist I did my best to support her.

"So you were drugged?" I asked as she took a tentative step wobbling but not falling into my waiting arms.

"Yeah I came back to the states to finish what I started, but they said I owed them for getting me across the border," she whispered, leaning on me but managing to walk, a miracle I was extremely grateful for, " I don't think I should be telling you this."

"Hey I'm a cop you can tell me anything I promise you you're safe just tell me," I coaxed.

"Lieutenant Duquesne that is not a promise you should ever make and you know it," she teased, but I could tell that underneath she was serious she didn't think I could keep her safe, I couldn't help but feel a little bit hurt.

"You don't think I can keep you safe," I said exactly what I was thinking.

"It's not you," she must have heard the hurt in my voice, I don't know why but I cared what she thought about me

"Then why don't you trust me to keep you safe?" I asked as we reached the edge of the road. Alexx and Eric begun to approach but I stopped them with a look, I wanted to hear her answer.

"Because I don't want to make you a killer," she said.

"I've killed someone already you wouldn't be making me a killer," I reasoned.

"There's no taking Valhalla in we already tried that, I'm going to kill him in cold blood, no warning no choice and probably die in the process, but as long as he dies my life is the price I'm willing to pay," it wasn't what I expected not at all.

"Why not let me protect you then no one has to die?" I asked her.

"It's not that easy, I wish it was but DOD, State, Justice, FBI, and Interpol none of them can protect me that's why they gave me the green light to kill him," she looked at me then her eyes were haunted and sad, "I shouldn't be your problem," her voice showed a vulnerability that it hadn't before and I realized then how very naked she was.

"You're not a problem now why do we get you checked out and get you a blanket I have extra clothes in the hummer if that will fit you," I told her, motioning for Alexx to come over, "This is Alexx she's out ME but she's good with the living to, are you ok with her or do you want me to stay?"

"Please stay," she was back to sounding small, as I helped her to sit down.

"Alright Angel let's see what's going on, Eric told me you were unconscious when Calleigh found you?" Alexx looked the question at me.

"Yeah, but she may have been drugged," I explained sitting behind her and wrapping my arms protectively around her. I felt her press closer to me as Alexx reached out gently to look at her wrists.

"Calleigh if I give you some wipes will you clean off this blood so I can see where it's coming from?" Alexx's question told me that she hadn't missed the woman's nervousness. I reached out for the box of wipes and took one I started with her hands making sure to let her see what I was doing. I was surprised when she took one of the wipes and begun to help me clean up the blood.

"Sugar, can you tell me if you are on any medication?" Alexx asked.

"I was on blood thinners and pain killers last year after I got stabbed, I should still be on the blood thinners but I ran out about a month ago when I left Italy and couldn't get a new script," she told Alexx, wiping at her stomach to reveal a messy scar that was still pink in most places. I heard Eric gasp and saw the woman's eyes go down.

"Eric will you grab my extra clothes and then call the lab I want Ryan to come out and you and him go to the crime scene we got called out here for, also ask Tripp to look up Lauren Reynolds and tell me what he can find about the car crash that killed her," I told him more to get him out of the way than anything.

"Can you tell me what hurts?" Alexx asked her softly as I moved to wiping her collarbone and neck.

"My head is pounding but really getting hit in the head with a two by four three years ago hurt more than this so did the beating I took in Colorado, and those both pale in comparison to the brand and stabbing last year," she sounded like she was talking about the weather and I realized that she had to be very good at compartmentalizing to talk like that.

"You haven't lived an easy life have you angel?" Alexx asked glancing up at me.

"I survived, which is better than I can say for some of the people," she said bluntly.

"What's you name sugar?" Alexx asked it seemed that she had only then realized that she didn't know.

"I… I can't answer that," she whispered. I felt my phone buzzing as Alexx looked a question at me, that clearly asked if I knew who she was.

"Duquesne," I answered shaking my head no at Alexx.

"Hey Calleigh, Tripp asked me if I could use my old FBI credentials to look into a car crash victim for you," she informed me.

"The crash is sealed?" I asked.

"Yeah and not just by the feds," she begun.

"Interpol, Justice, State, DOD and FBI," I remembered her saying none of them could protect her so I took a guess.

"Partially, I got into the FBI's file but it didn't say much, most of it was blacked out, all I got was that Lauren Reynolds was and arms dealer that worked with someone big, but she didn't just work with him she was his lover, there was a take down in Tuscany they had her in custody and then suddenly she's dead in fatal crash, most of the file doesn't make sense like, if she was in custody why was she driving? It looks like the file is originally with Interpol or MI6 cause the spelling is british but the clearance to read it is DOD and State Department. So why are you looking into and international car crash anyway?" Nat didn't seem to have much more information than I did, but it helped to know that what the woman was telling me was the truth.

"Can you search Valhalla?" I asked

"Um yeah, look Calleigh what is this about?" Natalia asked, I could hear her typing in the background.

"It a long story I'll explain later just call when you have something," I said hanging up the phone and putting it back in my pocket.

"You'll never find what you're looking for, there are only seven people in the world with access to the whole file," the woman told me reaching out for the tanktop Eric had brought over.

"I don't need the whole file just enough to know how to protect you," I told her Alexx was looking at a deep cut on her scalp that seemed to be the worst of her injuries.

"You don't have to protect me I can do ok, on my own," she said.

"Look where on your own got you why don't you let me try to help?" It was harsh and I knew it, but someone had to say it.

"Mrs, you need to go to a hospital and get blood tests run to check what you were drugged with and get a CT to check for skull fractures, but other than that you seem to be ok," Alexx said standing and walking back to her van.

"See I'm fine," she said.

"I didn't say that," Alexx said as my phone buzzed again.

"Talk to me Nat," I answered.

"Ok so I got a file that I think is what you're looking for, I tried just searching Valhalla and got everything from tax fraud to murder so I crossed it with the name Lauren Reynolds and a file popped up but it was if possible more blacked out than the Reynolds file which gave me an idea, since Lauren Reynolds wasn't in the visible bits of the file it was in the blacked out parts so the blackout was done on the computer. So, I searched the file for the name and sure enough it shows me where in the file the name is, but it didn't tell me anything because I couldn't see the surrounding words, then I did the same thing with the name Valhalla in the Lauren Reynolds file and I got something; Valhalla was the arms dealer that they took down in Tuscany, it looks like he escaped about a year ago and killed a bunch of people but I can't figure out where he escaped from, whom he killed or what happened to end it," Natalia said.

"Thanks Nat if I give you a name can you check if it's one of the the people he killed?" I asked thinking that Emily Prentiss had to be one of the deceased.

"I guess what's the name?" Nat asked.

"Emily Prentiss," I told her.

"Emily! what does Emily have to do with this?" Natalia was practically yelling at me.

"Natalia calm down who is Emily Prentiss?" I asked confused by her reaction.

"Someone I used to know, but she's a good agent..." Nat started.

"She's a good agent? Natalia how did you know her?" I asked, before I could hear Nat's response the woman grabbed the phone from my hand the woman was looking at me.

"Natalia Boa Vista I let the shit that you pulled with JJ go I cleaned up your mess back then, but I'm not dealing with your screw ups and lies today, Emily Prentiss died on the table last year and that's all you need to know! JJ didn't tell you because she can't trust you! and I sure as hell don't trust you! She may be willing to protect you and you know I would give my life to protect her but I have no problem letting Ian Doyal kill you if you get involved in this! If you want to live you stay the fuk out of this!" the woman screamed into the phone before before slamming it shut and doing something I did expect, she ran.

"Wait! Where are you going? There's nothing out here," I took off after her, but she had a head start and I was shorter than her.

When I finally caught up with her I couldn't even see the hummer behind us, I grabbed her shoulder spinning her around to face me, "You are going to die out here if you run off like that, and what the hell was that why are you and how do you know Natalia?" I was angry now.

"Who cares? If I die it's over, and ask your precious Nat how I know her, ask her how we got here," she screamed at me.

"Why don't you tell me? Because I know what I think, but I can't know unless you tell me and, honest I have no idea what is between you and Natalia," I yelled.

"What do you think then?" she asked.

"I think that when you go undercover they train you to answer certain questions certain ways and I think that Lauren Reynolds is a cover, but it's an old cover and after you stopped being Lauren you trained yourself that if anyone ever asked Lauren Reynolds died in a car crash. I think that you have a concussion and the drugs aren't out of your system, so when I ask what you name is the training kicks in, you go to answer that your name is Lauren Reynolds but as soon as you say the name you revert to died in a car crash. I think your real name is Emily Prentiss, but a year ago you were stabbed. That's where your scars come from, I think you were stabbed by Valhalla, the man you took down when you were undercover as Lauren Reynolds. I think you spent the last year telling yourself that Emily was dead and the only way you knew how to do that was the same way you did Lauren, name and how they died," I explained.

"How do you know that?" she asked looking at me for the first time, her eyes were dark pools of confusion.

"Well I know the only reason to seal the records of someone death is if they didn't die it wasn't hard to put together after that, so why don't you tell me what happened between you and Natalia?" I asked reaching out to touch her.

"Look if you want to know about Natalia ask her,but if you want to know about me I'll answer as long as we go somewhere I can get his blood out of my hair and pick up some guns, so I can set a trap," she replied.

"I have guns, lots of guns, they call me bullet girl for a reason," I told her leading her back toward the car.


	3. The Girl that Saved Me

**Disclaimer:** _I own nothing_

**A/N:** _chapter 3 is coming soon I promise_

I tried calling Calleigh back the second I saw the line disconnect, but no one answered. I tried again and when I still got no answer I called a number I hadn't called in two years.

"Jareau," she answered on the second ring, she sounded just like she always used to, professional and upbeat but in a way that made everyone she spoke to relax.

"Jen… I need to talk to you," It was the best I could do for an explanation I just hoped she didn't hang up on me

"Nat, now's not a good time," her voice was icy and I felt tears prick my eyes, my best friend hated me, I was a horrible person that had done horrible things.

"Jen please hear me out I'm not calling about myself I know you hate me, but I need to talk to you about Emily," I told her.

"Emily's dead Nat you got her there what more do you have to say?" Jen snarled at me, and hearing her mad at me made me cry. I clung to the phone as I watched my salty tears cover the keyboard in front of me.

"How did I get her there? I haven't spoken to either of you in two years, and Jen I know she's not dead," my voice was cracking but I knew after seeing the Reynolds file Calleigh was in danger and I couldn't let her get hurt without all the information.

"Do you know the price she paid to get me off after you lied? She played her mothers political game one more time, on international TV, it got her recognized by an old enemy one that killed her," Jen's words and tone were cruel, I sunk to my knees on the floor of the lab. It broke me to hear Jen, my Jen, yelling at me, what was worse was that my lie had not only hurt Jen but now Calleigh.

"Jen I'm sorry I'm so sorry you can do whatever you want to me I'm sorry and I'll find a way to show you how sorry I am, but Jen she's not dead she was just screaming at me over the phone," my voice had gone to the way I used to talk to Nick when he was moments from hitting me. I didn't know what I thought she would do to me from DC, but I knew I was in the wrong and so I presented myself for whatever I was going to get.

"I'm not going to hit you Nat so stop acting like the victim with me. And how do you know it was Emily?" Jen asked a little more gently this time.

"She said she cleaned up my mess when I lied but then she said Emily was dead," I told her.

"So you know where she is?" Jen interrogated.

"She's with a coworker of mine," I stared, " I also know she is Lauren Reynolds."

"You tell no one that do you hear me Nat keep your mouth shut, I'll be there in three hours," she ordered then for the second time that day I was hung up on.

"Eric where's Calleigh?" I asked as soon Eric got off the elevator to the lab. It had been over three hours since I'd talked to JJ and I hadn't heard for Calleigh.

"I don't know I thought she'd be back here by now," He told me.

"But wasn't she with you?" I asked, letting my fingers run through my hair in frustration. I was frantic to find her before Jen showed up.

"She was, then she went all hero on some chick in the glades and told me to get Ryan to take her place, I thought she'd be back Alexx said the woman was fine just to get her checked at the hospital as a precaution, if you need her call her," He soothed.

"I tried, she won't answer, I think she's mad at me," I rushed pacing in front of him.

"Why would Calleigh be mad at you, last I heard from her you were solving her case and she was running off into the glades after her Vic then Ryan showed up and I left her the hummer?" I knew Eric was trying to be calming but it just wasn't helping my emotions were spiraling.

"Because I screwed up, I'm a terrible person and I let the people I care about get hurt, because I didn't listen to Emily and I called Jen, because…" I stopped rambling when Eric grabbed my shoulders stopping me from moving.

"What exactly happened Natalia, who is Emily what happened between you and Calleigh?" Eric help me still making me look at him.

"I…" I started trying to think of where to start, but before I could come up with what to say I felt rather than saw Jen get off the elevator.

"Take your hands off of her," Jen's voice was cold as ice, Eric let go of me backing away.

"Jen it's alright, well no it's not Jen I lost Emily I don't know where they went, but Eric wasn't trying to hurt me, I promise Jen," I turned to her looking at the ground.

"Nat, look at me sweetheart," she waited to continue till I met her eyes, "I didn't expect you to hold on to her, she's good at running and when it comes to Doyle she's a lone ranger, but if she surfaced here enough that you got her name it's likely this will be the last stand, I'm here to clean up the mess I started," then she did the one thing I never thought she'd do again; she pulled me into a hug, "I've missed you," was whispered in my ear. Those small words broke the dam to my emotions and I let the tears fall onto her shoulder.

"God, Jen I missed you so much, I'm sorry, I know I screwed up and there is no way I can ever make it up to you. You went out on a limb for me and I fucked up all I can do now is say I'm sorry," I clung to her not having realized how much I missed her until she was here in Miami.

"Nat, it's alright, calm down and breathe for me baby, I promise you we can talk about us, but I need to find Emily first ok," Jen coaxed gently.

"I don't know where she is, I lost her and Calleigh," I tried to pull myself together but the panic was still there and I wasn't too good at controlling it.

"Who the hell are you?" Eric cut in.

"I'm Jennifer Jareau, JJ, state department liaison to the DOD, previously Supervisory Special Agent with the FBI's Behavioural Analysis Unit," Jen said letting me go to shake Eric's hand.

"Why are you here?" Eric asked.

"I called Jen," I whispered looking at the ground.

"Why do we need a federal liaison?" Eric asked,

I didn't know if it was directed at me or Jen but she answered, "Because I used to the be press liaison for the FBI's Behavioral Analysis Unit, and I'm one of seven people that knows enough to clean up after what Emily is here to do," Jen told him.

"So who is Emily?" Eric asked.

"The lady Calleigh found on the glades," I answered.

"You mean Calleigh found a serial killer and you're only telling me now god Natalia you could have called, Calleigh could be dead," Eric was angry now.

"Emily's not a killer, she's one of my best friends, she worked for the feds until and international criminal came after her last year," Jen cut in stepping between Eric and I as if she was going to stop him from coming at me.

"What happened a year ago why did she lose her badge?" Eric asked.

"She didn't lose her badge she almost her life and in order to protect her we faked her death, Interpol and DOD gave her the green light to track Doyle herself and kill him, I took her to Paris set her up with three identities and quite a bit of money, from what I gathered from our scrabble games she used the french papers first for almost six months then burned the ID and went on to Tuscany to Ian's old villa using the Italian alias but she got burned less than a month in so she backtracked to Russia trying to figure out how he got out in hoped of hunting him down.I think something went wrong in Russia because I lost track of her for almost two months then last month her Russian papers were recorded entering Cuba," Jen explained.

"You think she was trying to get back to the states?" Eric asked.

"I think it's pretty high on the list of options, but if she was coming back to the states all she would have had to do was contact interpol we would have pulled her out," Jen said.

"What if she didn't want to be pulled out?" I asked having thought of an idea.

"What do you mean?" Jen countered

"Well wet foot dry foot is a policy that means if you get one foot on dry land coming from cuba you can file for asylum and get a green card," I glanced at Eric making sure I was correct in my interpretation, "some of the people that come over don't have paperwork so I'm sure there are ways to get it here. If Emily didn't want to be pulled out, but was out of the clean papers she may have tried to use that system to get new papers, but a lone woman with no papers is an easy target for human traffickers," I explain what I was thinking.

"If she tried to run from human traffickers it would explain why Calleigh and I found her left for dead in the Glades," Eric put in.

"If human trafficker got her she would have run she knows our laws well enough to know that we grant asylum to victims of human trafficking without papers, but she wouldn't have given you her name, now that her name has surfaced it's going to up her timetable," Jen profiled.

"What do yo mean upped her timetable?" Eric asked.

"Well as soon as Detective Tripp typed in the name Lauren Reynolds it triggered four electronic alarms, one that was put in place by the DOD and went straight to me and Aaron Hotchner in Afghanistan who is on his way, the next was put in by interpol and went to Clyde in London, one that was out in by Penelope Garcia with the FBI and went to the BAU, the last we are working on tracing but it looks like it went to Doyle which means he's coming here," Jen said. As if on cue the elevator door opened and Frank Tripp walked out followed by four people two of which looked like feds and one I knew from pictures to be Penelope Garcia. The young man, whose appearance didn't really scream fed I assumed to be Doctor Spencer Reid, that made the black man Derek Morgan and the aging Italian David Rossi.

"Delko, where is Calleigh?" Frank's voice boomed across the atrium.

"Why does everyone think I'm her keeper?" Eric sounded exasperated.

"JJ what are you doing here?" Morgan asked.

"I was just taking my old College roommate Nat here and her new boyfriend mister Delko here out for lunch," Jen lied smoothly giving me a pointed look, "We'll have to catch up after lunch I'm sure you have a case to get to."

"Yes lunch," I said grabbing Eric hand and dragging him to the elevator, I was glad it was still on our floor so we didn't have to wait. As soon as the door closed behind us I turned on Jen, "They don't know do they?"

"No and I can't tell them, not till Doyle is dead," Jen whispered

"What was that?" Eric asked.

"Jen never told her team that Emily was alive," I explained.

"It will just put them in danger, the only people that know are me, Hotch, Clyde, Cruz, Strauss, the director, and Emily herself, well and you two," Jen told us.

"And Calleigh maybe Alexx, so what do you plan on doing at 'lunch'," Eric added.

"Well you're going to tell me a few things about the area and Calleigh and then you and Nat go back to your lives…" She started.

"No, I'm going with you," I cut her off as the elevator dinged letting us off on the first floor. She gave me a look that said I hadn't won but now wasn't the time to debate it. I knew it would be a fight, but their was no way in hell I was letting Jen, Calleigh and Emily do this alone. We walked out of CSI and Jen led us to an unmarked black car.

"Where would you go if you needed guns and ammo but didn't have a permit?" Jen asked getting into the drivers side.

"I don't know I would have to look it up," Eric replied opening the door but not moving to get in.

"I would go to Calleigh," I answered assuming she was trying to get a step ahead of Emily.

"What do you mean?" Jen raised an eyebrow at me as I slid into the passenger seat.

"If I needed a gun I would go to Calleigh," I explained, "and Emily is already with Calleigh which means if they go to Calleigh's house they have all the guns they could ever want. She's not our ballistics expert for nothing."

"So we go to Calleigh's house," Jen determined before turning the key in the ignition to start the car.

"Nat can take you to Calleigh's I'm going to go and stop the rumors that we're dating, I won't volunteer where you are going, but I won't lie to Tripp," Eric said before closing the car door and walking back toward CSI.


	4. The Girl with The Gun Room

**Disclaimer:** _I do not own Criminal Minds or CSI Miami_

**A/N:** _All mistakes are mine this is supposed to be an awkward happy chapter, I know if I reread it to edit it I will scrap it cause every time I read my happy chapters I ant to throw them out, no idea why, maybe I'm not good at happy, but that's for you all to decide. Also you owe docmadi96 for keeping me focused and getting this done tonight rather than sometime next week_

"Please just let me take you to the hospital just for a check, yo don't have to give them your name?" Calleigh asked for what felt like the hundredth time I wasn't really upset by her concern, but I really just wanted to get Doyle and going to the hospital wasn't going to help that. We were sitting in her living room trying to come up with a plan for exactly what to do.

"I swear if you ask one more time I'm running away. I promise to stay awake until I see a doctor but that's going to have to wait till tomorrow," I told her.

"I'll drop it, but you are sleeping tonight, I'm not letting you go into a firefight sleep deprived," She scolded, I was glad for this because if I was honest I was tired and it was barely two in the afternoon.

"So Cal, what is the longest range you can accurately sniper from?" I asked having formed the basis of a plan already. Calleigh could shoot long distance so their was no need for her to get close to Doyle if I could set the location she could be my guardian angel in the sky, I just needed to know where to set us up.

"I'm good up to about 700 yards, but I think we should sry for one of the abandoned shipping docks, there are normally not many people and it will give me plenty of places to scout from also the constant movement of containers will stop him from having much time to plan" She answered, I liked her choice in tactics, so I nodded.

"You will be my angel in the sky, I will tell him to come alone, but most likely he will bring at least two others with him. I'll give you his picture, when it comes down to it you take the shot at him first then the others. I can shoot most nine mils both left and right handed so if you can give me two guns it will increase my odds of survival just a little," I added. My hope being that if she could take out Ian I could take his guards.

"I don't want you to die," she whispered pulling me closer to her on the couch, so she could wrap her arms around me.

"I don't want to die either, and with you as an angel it's possible that I wont, but, I am willing to give my life if it means that mine is the last life Ian Doyle takes," I told her running my fingers up and down her arms. the feel of her body pressed against my was so incredibly calming that I felt my muscles relax into the touch.

"Hey I have to tell you that in my gun room if you lift up the carpet there's a hatch that leads to a five foot basement, since I know at some point tonight someone will come looking for us I thought you should know now so you aren't surprised," Calleigh's words were pure logic but her voice was that of someone lost in her own head. I moved around in her arms so I could look at her. Her emerald eyes had glazed over.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

"That I've never let anyone in my sanctuary and now the one person I am comfortable letting in is someone I barely know," she confessed

"Well I could always sneak out the window if it would make you feel better?" I joked.

"It's not that I don't want you Emily it's just that I guess I want to show you my little hide away and I don't know why, the logical side of me is saying that I should take you back to CSI and have you locked up for attempted murder, but my heart says that I should help keep you safe and now I'm planning to show you my hidden place. I'm afraid of losing you tomorrow and I don't even know you," Calleigh revealed. I could see the beginnings of tears in her eyes so I did the only thing I could think; I pulled her into my arms kissing her forehead.

"I promise you I will do my best to stay alive tomorrow but why don't we go lay down and try to get some sleep that way if we have to grab the guns and get out of here we will at least have some sleep cause if the cops come after us we may have to stay on the move," I promised her, standing and helping her to her feet.

"You promise to still be here when I wake up?" she asked shyly as she led me down the hall to her bedroom.

"Yes," I replied.

I woke to the sound of knocking, "Calleigh! are you home?" yelled from outside. I felt Calleigh move jumping from the bed.

"Come on, that's Natalia, she has a key we have to go," I had to read her lips she was so quiet. I saw her grab her service pistol off the end table and we moved out of the bedroom to the one room with no windows in the center of the house. Someone knocked again at what I assumed to be the front door.

"Calleigh I'm coming in!" Natalia yelled from the direction of the front door, as Calleigh closed the door to her little armory behind us. I wouldn't have noticed the hook in the corner of the carpet if I hadn't known it had to be there, but Calleigh knew and she was already pulling it up to reveal the hatch. I heard the front door open as Calleigh dropped from sight.

"We're clear," Calleigh whispered, I ducked as she pulled the trapp door down quietly over us. She must have hit a switch cause a small lamp lit up and I looked at the room we were in. It wasn't really a room, it was a small space about seven feet by seven feet with a five foot ceiling. Black pillows lined the walls with and the and their were plenty of red blankets on the carpeted floor.

"So how do you like my little getaway room?" she asked shyly sitting down in a corner and motioning for me to do the same.

"I love it," I replied scooting as close to her as I could get before dropping down to sit between her spread legs, so I could rest my head on her shoulder, "but why on earth was this build into the house?" I saw a flush rise on her cheeks.

"The people that commissioned the house were into S and M they were trying to build a dungeon for their play, but this is Miami half the city's below sea level The contractor hit water and told them it was a no go so they pulled out of the deal. By that point most of the structure was in and half the house was built,the real estate agent was an old friend of mine and helped me get a good deal. I asked if instead of filling the whole they could make me this, the guy nearly jumped for joy since he's already bought the supplies for the basement," Calleigh whispered in my ear, it was hard to focus on her words when I could feel her breath.

"Can we sleep down here?" I asked hoping if we layed down I could focus on something other that the woman I was in a very confined space with.

"Yeah it's probably a good idea," she replied against my ear. I scooted forward so she could lay down beside the wall, then I lay in front of her leaving about an inch between grabbed on of the blankets and pulled it around us before moving so she so close to me that I could feel her eyelids close against my neck.


	5. The Girl with The Secrets

**A/N: **_I promise to be better about updating *looks guilty* however if anyone has anything they would like to see with this story plot bunnies are always appreciated _

**Disclaimer:** _I own nothing_

Sitting in the car with Nat outside Calleigh's house I realized that no matter what had happened in the past their was no awkwardness between Nat and I.

"It doesn't look like anyone is here," Nat said.

"Well you said you had a key so why don't we go and see," I decided, truly I wasn't a fan of keying onto a cops house, but I was hoping to find Emily before Doyle found her and if it meant I profiled a cop and used her to get to Emily I was ok with that. Having the BAU here was making me nervous because their was so much that they didn't know and I've never prided myself on keeping secrets especially from my family and now I have so many things I can't tell them.

"Alright, but if she asks can we say this was your idea? I don't want to lose the only friend I have here," Her voice sounded sad and I filed it away to ask about later.

"You can say anything you want Nat, say I held a gun to your head if you want you know I will go along with it, you're one of my two best friends I'd do anything for you," I relied getting out of the car.

"Jen don't say that, I lost you the last time you went out on a limb for me, once we find Emily I'll lose you again, please don't make this harder then it is by acting like we're still friends," her voice choked and I had to stop halfway up to the house to look at her, I could tell she was close to crying.

"Nat I still consider you a friend, I may not have liked you the last time I heard from you, but I have always and will always love you. I promised to talk to you and if the house is empty we can have that talk while we wait outside for someone to show up, but I need to find Emily because she is in danger. She did a lot for me two years ago and I can't let her die because of it," I said.

"What does this have to do with what happened two years ago?" she asked.

"Nat, this is not your fault, and you have to promise me that you won't blame yourself," I begun knowing that telling her wasn't a good idea.

"Fine," she said, I waited, "Promise."

"Emily used her Mother's name to get me off of Nick's excessive force charge, the price for it was that she had to attend her mother's next charity gala at the time it didn't seem like a bad idea, but charity gala's are televised internationally. Apparently one of the guards in Korea's off book prison, that might I add is the most ruthless prison in the world, likes to watch american charity events for the fashion. That's how Ian Doyle found out Lauren Reynolds was Emily Prentiss and that she was alive," I told her watching her to gage her reaction she looked broken, "Nat it's not your fault ok, I want you back in my life. I miss you. I miss you so much that sometimes I wake up and all I can think about it is you. I keep tabs on you every week to make sure you're ok, after we find Emily I'm not leaving you unless you want me too, but I need to find her." It was the truth if it weren't for Emily being in danger I would have thrown myself into her arms and never let go.

"So now, what do we do Jen?" Nat asked, we'd searched the house and deduced that someone had been there, but all of Lieutenant Duquesne's guns were accounted for except her service pistol, I wouldn't have known the difference because the Lieutenant had a room dedicated to guns it contained more guns than your average SWAT storage but Nat said they were all still in the room so that meant that Emily would probably be here sometime later now we were left to sit on the house.

"We wait, we talk about us," I replied, walking out of Lieutenant Duquesne's house, "Pull the battery from your phone though I don't want Garcia finding us here just yet."

"What do I say Jen, I'm sorry I don't deserve you and I know it so I'm sorry," Nat sounded so broken it made my blood run hot, Nick had made her think she was worthless and it made me wish I had killed him.

"Nat, come here," I opened the door to the back seat of the car and waited for her to get in on the other side. Once she was in I pulled her into my lap as best I could in the confined space, "Natalia don't talk like that, you are an amazing woman and the only thing you deserve is to be treated like a princess. The things that Nick did to you and the way that he made you feel were wrong." She wasn't looking at me now and I could tell that she was crying. All I wanted to do was to take away her pain and undue the damage that Nick had done.

"But Jen I'm not a princess I'm a broken mess, no one could ever love me thats why Nick did what he did he was trying to teach me to be good but I didn't learn," She was sobbing now clinging to me like I was some kind of lifeline, if Emily would have showed up now I can't say that I would have done anything about it.

"What makes you think you are anything but perfect?" I prodded softly needing to know what had given her this warped view of herself.

"Jen there were things that I didn't tell you in college, I'm not the angel you think I am, before Nick I dated girls but I only liked it when they would use...things… in me so I thought that I had to like boys, but I still look at girls. Sometimes I like it to hurt I like to be tied up Jen I'm broken," she blurted out, I could feel the heat rise from my chest to my cheeks, right before she'd started dating Nick I had wanted to ask her out but I had always thought that I would have to give up the things I liked and make my preferences more mainstream, I had been ready to to it when she'd come home and said Nick had asked her out.

"Natalia, none of those things make you any less of an amazing person and none of them give anyone the right to cross the line of consensual into abuse," I told her, hoping it sounded more put together than I felt, because my heart was doing flips at the thought that Nat would date a girl and the things that Nat had said were both making me furious at Nick and turning me on.

"Really and who would want a girl that like girls but likes things in her and likes to be hurt? Who would want that and not want to hurt me Jen?" Nat's voice was shaking and I could tell that she was waiting for me tell her that she was awful. She was shaking like a leaf in my arms as I stroked her hair as gently as I could. Her fear of me disowning her is what made me answer the way I did.

"Me, I would want you, I wanted you a long time ago but was too shy to ask because I figured you didn't want me," I replied, stopping all of my movements giving her the chance to run if she wanted, she didn't.

We spent the rest of the night watching the house and talking, I promised her that once Doyle was dead I would stay with her for at least a week and we would find a way to make it so that we could be not only friends again but maybe something more.


	6. The Girl with Angel Wings

**A/N:** _Ok so I think this is about the midpoint of this story there will be another four or five chapters and an epilogue there will be two sequels. one ofi which will revolve around the episode 200 of criminal minds impute is always welcome._

**Disclaimer: ** _If I owned anything I wouldn't be as broke as I am_

"Cal, sweetheart wake up," came a soft female voice. I snuggled deeper into the blankets trying to ignore whoever I'd brought home...brought home! My eyes flew open to see brown eyes staring back at me, I recognized the dim light of my sanctuary. Before I remembered who was in here with me I reached for my gun.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle you Calleigh," Emily whispered backing away from me looking nervous. I remembered why she was here and what we had to do today and I instantly felt bad for frightening her.

"It's alright Em, I just wasn't fully awake yet," I comforted reaching out so I could touch her. Her hands were soft in mine and I could tell she was shaking I wasn't sure if she was afraid of me or afraid of the thing we were going to do today, but I wanted to take that fear away so I coaxed her into my arms and just held her whispering soft reassurances until she stopped quivering.

"We should get going, Natalia and JJ, an old coworker are staking out your front door so I'm hoping you have another way out," she told me pulling out of my arms, I noticed then that the trap door was open and there were duffle bags in my gun room that I assumed she had packed.

"Natalia doesn't do field work, why would she be stalking me out?" I asked not expecting an answer.

"Probably because JJ brought her, how JJ got here so fast is a question I don't have the answer too though," Emily explained, though her words only opened the door for more questions like; who was JJ? Why wasn't she helping us? Why would she bring Natalia in the field? And how did she know Natalia? But now wasn't the time for twenty questions now was the time for us to get to the docks so that when Doyle showed up at eight thirty we would be ready. I'd showed Emily last night which guns I wanted and I knew she had taken some for herself

"Well I have a back door and we can jump the fence into the alley and walk up to the buss stop, then ride to CSI and my car from the garage," I said.

"Ok lets do this," she replied pulling herself from my arms and climbing up into my gun room. I missed her touch as soon as it was gone but I knew it was necessary since I too had to get out of my sanctuary and get ready to do the one thing I never thought I would plan to do; kill someone.

I always thought it would be hard to commit premeditated murder, but lying here on the top of a cargo carrier I realize when you love someone it's not hard at all. Love did I just think love, I didn't really mean that. Did I? I had time to think while I was waiting up here and I can't tell you if this is love, but I know one thing in the twentyfour hours since I met Emily, I've been happier than with any man I've ever dated and not only that but I'm willing to kill for her without a second thought. I can see her through my scope she looks completely confident, as though she were simply enjoying the salty air, but I know she's afraid. Seeing the car approach I want to call it off, want to take her and run away with her to a place where she doesn't have to be afraid. I want to protect her from harm because I know that she'd had more than a lifetimes worth already. I'm afraid that the car is going to just run her over, but it doesn't. When it stops about four feet in front of her I watch as three men get out.

"You're outnumbered Lauren," One of the men says with a thick Irish accent,I can hear threw the bug I put on Emily's holster. I had set it up so that once Emily drew the gun the bug would go dead that way I wouldn't hear the shots That's all I needed to know which of the three men I had to take out first. I spotted the flag to gage the wind speed before looking down the sight and taking aim.

"I'm here to end this Ian, I didn't expect to live why bring anyone with me?" Emily sounded cold and I knew that was my cue. I let all the breath out of my body as everyone below reached for guns. my finger twitched on the trigger. I heard the bug go dead as Emilys gun cleared the holster. I sighted and let another round go, then a third. I saw the three men fall I knew that I had killed Doyle but the other two I didn't know if it had been me or Emily. I watched as Emily sank to the ground, I didn't know if she was hurt so I ran rather than walked down from my perch.

"Emily! Come on please be ok! You do not get to die on me!" I yelled running across the pavement. She looked up at me from where she was sitting on the asphalt.

"It's ok, Calleigh, I'm fine, I promise you, I'm just so relieved, it's all over," her voice cracked and I knew she was crying, but tears I could fix. I vowed then to hunt down every person who had ever hurt her so that she would never have to be afraid again.

"Come on, Em we got to get out of here," I whispered gently reaching out and pulling her to her feel.


	7. The Girl with Someone to Fear

**A/N: **_first this is officially the longest story I have published second sorry for the cliffy next chapter should be up by monday at the latest_

**Disclaimer:** _If I owned Criminal Minds or CSI Miami I wouldn't be broke _

I woke to someone knocking on the window of the car, so maybe I'm not good at stake outs since I fell asleep. I felt Jen move beneath me and realized she too must have been asleep because she didn't move to open the door right away.

"Mame, open the door," I recognized Ryan's voice. I felt Jen reach across me and open the door.

"Ryan what are you doing?" I asked sleepily.

"Natalia? I think the better question is what you are doing," he asked, looking into the car at us.

"Well I was sleeping," I replied cautiously.

"Sleeping, with a murderer, Natalia she killed someone this morning," he glared at Jen, "and do you know how much time we've spent looking for you? worrying about you? Natalia you vanished with a murderer we thought you were dead," Ryan snapped at me, I wanted to flinch away but Jen was rubbing soothing circles on my hip and somehow it made Ryan yelling at me ok.

"She's not a murderer, she didn't do anything Ryan," I replied pressing my back closer to Jen and feeling her reassuring squeeze.

"Well she's wanted for the murder of Ian Doyle who was murdered two hours ago at the docks, so I'm going to have to ask both of you to get out of the car," Ryan growled.I felt Jen tense behind me.

"She didn't do it I've been with her all night,," I defended, making no move to get out of the car.

"Natalia, I don't want to have to make you get out of the car, but you said it yourself you were asleep," He raised his voice and I saw his hand move toward his gun, I couldn't control it this time I flinched pressing as close to Jen as I could. I wanted to defend her, but I didn't know how to say that since Nick I couldn't sleep threw so much as a cat moving in the same room as me let alone my pillow getting up and killing someone.

"Easy Nat, you're ok," Jen whispered in my ear, "Look I'll come out no need to threaten anyone," Ryan looked a little taken aback, weather it was because I had flinched away from him, or because Jen was surrendering I wasn't sure. As Ryan stepped back Jen eased me forward until I could put my feet on the ground and climb out. I could see Tripp, and Delko a couple yards away. Tripp looked surprised to see me while Eric looked more uncomfortable. The feds that I assumed to be Jen's team stood even further back. I stayed close to her as she stepped out behind me.

"Keep your hands where I can see them Miss Jareau!" Ryan yelled at her, twitching toward the gun again, I stepped back until I was pressed against JJ's body shielding her I could feel her moving and I knew that she was showing Ryan her hands.

"Ryan Stop! she didn't do anything wrong," I tried to sound commanding, but my voice was too high and I just sounded panicked.

"Natalia she murdered someone this morning in cold blood, how can you protect her?" Ryan yelled at me, and I realized I could stand up for Jen but when he yelled at me I was suddenly afraid of him hurting me, and the only protection I had was Jen.

"Stop yelling at her, it's me you want," Jen snarled wrapping on arm protectively around my waist as if she knew that Ryan had scared me.

"I can protect her because I know she didn't do it, and more than that she has always protected me, I owe her this," I replied coldly I could see the shock on Ryans face.

"Her own team that calls themselves her family say that she had the motive to do it how are you so sure she didn't?" He snapped at me.

"Motive really that's all you have on me? Well why don't you ask my family if I'm the only one here with motive?" Jen hissed at Ryan before yelling across the street, "Huh Hotch? You know full well the only one of us that wouldn't kill him is Garcia and that wouldn't be for lack of trying, but you also know I'm not the one that did it!" one of the agents that I could only assume to be Hotchner gave us a quizzical look before a look of realization passed across his face.

"Natalia step away from her," Ryan snapped at me glaring.

"No Ryan, I know with one hundred percent certainty that she didn't do it, I also have one guess at how did, but you won't hear me out you are just coming after Jen like she's some low life criminal. I won't let you take her in like this because you will destroy her reputation and I won't let you do that when you're wrong!" I growled back. Seeing that Agent Hotchner was getting closer I really hoped he was going to defuse the situation not make it worse. I could also see Delko and Tripp easing forward slowly.

"Natalia they were all in the police station when Doyle was killed the only other person in this city with motive is her the guy only flew in last night," Ryan tried to reason with me, but obviously I knew more than he did about the situation and if Doyle was in fact dead it was time for all the cards to be laid out.

"No she's not, Calleigh's Jane Doe from the glades has motive," I hissed at him, he looked confused.

"How would you know that, we don't even know who she is, wait is that why you're outside Calleigh's house? You think Calleigh would kill someone?" Ryan was back to yelling and I realized I'd made it worse, but before I could say anything Hotchner was next to Ryan.

"Are you saying she's here in Miami?" Hotchner asked Jen, completely ignoring Ryan and me.

"Why do you think I came here? I only got here a few minutes before you did?" Jen asked him.

"So why not work with us? Why run away and go off the grid?" He asked.

"Because they're going to hate me when they find out I lied to them, and I thought I could find her faster on my own if I didn't have to do the explaining which by the looks of it you haven't done," Jen hissed back at him.

"How did you expect to find her?" Hotch asked.

"Well I know she was last seen with a cop and from what I can tell she's still with that cop the thing is I don't know where they went. Clyde's on his way from London and should be here in about an hour, you know he got her a warrant that gave her the international green light to kill. If I know Emily worth anything she'll lay low until Clyde gets in, because I doubt she has the warrant on her anymore, but once she contacts Clyde she'll turn herself in, Hotch just give her a little more time," Jen said calmly.

"JJ if she did this why wouldn't she cary Clyde's warrant on her, whoever killed Doyle planned it?" Hotch asked.

"Because she probably lost it getting here when Calleigh found her she wasn't in good shape and the best guess we have is that she was trying to stay under the radar getting into the US but she didn't have clean papers to do so. My best guess is she got to cuba and tried was trying to get across the ocean so she could use the asylum laws to get new papers, but she fell into the hands of human traffickers. She may have even done it intentionally because once here she got defiant enough that they left her for dead in the glades," I cut in.

"Why do I feel like all of you know way more than you are telling me?" Ryan asked, "You asked me to arrest her saying that if Ian Doyle was dead she was the only one that could have done it, but now you both seem to have someone else in mind."

"I thought Emily was still in Russia, I have all of her papers flagged to tell me if she entered the US I didn't consider it a possibility that she came here without papers," Hotch said.

"Well I talked to her on the phone she's here," I snapped, Hotch looked at me then as if only then giving me the time of day.

"How do you know it was her?" Have you ever met her?" He asked.

"Yeah a couple years ago when I called you from the hospital," Jen said being very careful not to explain more. I could see the recognition in his eyes.

"Ok, so we go back to the station and wait for her to come in? And JJ no more lone ranger bullshit," Hotch said he looked at me then, "I assume you are the one that called her then," I nodded afraid he was going to tell the world my secret, "Thank you."

"So am I arresting her or not?" Ryan asked.

"No," Hotch said, "but she is coming with us."

Sitting in the police station waiting had been making me anxious so I had gone down to the lab to try to calm down by throwing myself into my work. I'd lost track of time and was now rushing to put things away and get back to the station before Clyde, whoever he was arrived when I heard a voice that made me freeze.

"I'm looking for the morgue," Nicks voice floated past the desk and into the evidence locker where I stood.

"Name of the deceased," the desk clerk asked him.

"I'm here to put in an application," he replied, I took a deep breath knowing that I had to do something, but being nearly paralyzed with fear. I forced myself to walk out and around the counter.

"You can't be here," I hissed trying not to let my voice shake.

"I hoped I'd run into you love, think she can show me, everything I need," he added to the desk clerk.

"I have a restraining order," I snapped at him, doing my best to present as strong even though I was terrified.

"It expired last month, see I did my research to find you," he reached out and ran his fingers threw my hair, I tried to pull away but he grabbed my arm, "Do you really want all these people to see what a little whore you are?"

"Let me go," my voice was rising I could face killers, but when it came to Nick I was letting myself panic."

"Either come with me or fight me your choice," he pulled me toward the elevator and I knew I didn't have the strength to stop him, but I also knew that if I fought here someone would help me. I felt my body freeze when I tried to force myself to fight. They say when you are truly afraid your options are fight or flight, but there is a third option freezing when you are so afraid that your body stops working, and that was what was happening to me.

"Stop," I whimpered, as he pressed the elevator button.

"What are you going to do if I don't? Cry," he hissed at me. I heard the elevator ding and knew that it was now or never, but still my body wouldn't move. The doors slid open as he wrapped my arm behind my back pulling it up so the shoulder was near dislocation. I looked into the elevator that was about to be my tinny prison and saw two people.


	8. The Girls with History and Love

**Disclaimer: **_as usual I own nothing_

**A/N:** _I promise to be better about updating in a timely manner there are only four more chapter left of this story but I have plans for one maybe two squeals revolving around the episode 200 of Criminal minds, thoughts? I hope to have this story complete by the end of the week but that may be me being a little too hopeful. _

Riding up the elevator to Calleigh's lab was one of the most terrifying things I've done in a long time, since I expected that I was wanted for murder by now, and I'd lost the warrant Clyde got me in Russia.

"Emily it's ok you're safe now, no one here is going to hurt you," Calleigh whispered hugging me from behind.

"Cal, I'm a killer until Clyde gets here cop don't usually treat killers well," I replied leaning into her touch. The elevator dinged and the doors begun to open. Natalia almost fell into the elevator, but the man behind her had his hand wound into her hair and his other hand had grabbed her wrist and wound it behind her back. I could see the joint straining and I knew that if he put any more tension on it it would pull out of it's socket, but he didn't seem to care.

"Emily!" she sounded shocked looking at me in panic.

"Natalia," I wanted to try for cold, but she looked so afraid that I knew I had to do something, "Let her go," I stared at him with hard eyes.

"She's my whore I can do with her what I please," the man growled pulling her arm until it came out of the socket. Natalia cried out stumbling as he released her arm. I caught her trying to be as gentle as I could but still get her away from him. His hand was still in her hair but she had collapsed into my arms.

"So you're Nick," I growled reaching up her back so that I could grab his wrist, I felt for the pressure point in his wrist before looking him in the eye and letting my eyes go dead, "I've killed three people today I have no problem making it four, you leave her alone or I kill you. I won't throw you out a window and let you live, I'll just kill you." I watched him look into my eyes as if he was trying to find a lie, but I'd spent enough time with Ian that I knew how to fake the look of a hardened criminal. When I'd been Lauren I'd convinced weapons traffickers that I didn't mind killing without killing anyone. I knew how to make my eyes look so dead that I looked like a killer.

"I'm Nick, why do you care about this whore," He said taking half a step back.

"I care because she no longer belongs to you, and if you haven't let go her her by the time I count to three I'll break this wrist," I dug my thumb into the pressure point, he let go instantly taking another step back, "If you come near her again I will kill you, and it won't be an easy death for you." I stepped out of the elevator using the arm around Natalia's waist to lift her up. She whimpered in my arms and I knew that the movement must have hurt, but I knew it would be easier to carry her than to try to get her to walk.

"What the hell was that?" I heard Calleigh snap at me. I had almost forgotten that she was with me in the elevator and that I hadn't told her any of Natalia's secrets.

"Cal, I need a private room and that ME that checked me out when you found me," I told her ignoring the question.

"Well the firearms la should be empty, but I want an explanation," Calleigh hissed at me.

"Lead the way, I'll explain when we get to your lab," I told her, knowing that whether Natalia wanted me to or not I was going to tell Calleigh the truth because I couldn't lie to her.

"Please, don't I'm ok, I just want Jen," Natalia cried in my arms.

"Natalia you need a doctor, and unless you called her JJ isn't here, but once you get that shoulder reset I'll call her," I whispered in her ear.

"She's here, she's downstairs with everyone else, please Emily, I'll be god just please, I want Jen," she begged as we walked into the firearms lab. I set her on the counter as gently as I could, but didn't step away so that she could continue to hold me with her good arm and not have to move her other arm.

"I asked Alexx to grab Jen on her way up from the morgue," Calleigh cut in, "Now explain."

"That was Nick," Natalia whispered, looking down to the floor.

"I got that, who the hell is Nick," Calleigh sounded pissed now and I could tell that Natalia was panicking but the tightening of the muscles in her hand.

"Cal, you're scaring her," I reprimanded even though I knew she didn't know anything so she didn't know what she had done but I needed her to calm her tone of voice if I was going to get anywhere with an explanation. I waited for her eyes to flick to Natalia for a moment and once I saw the understanding in them I went on, "I wouldn't actually kill him, but I'm not putting up with his shit either, he should still be in prison, how he got out I don't know. What I do know is that if he would have gone away on the proper charges he would still be in prison."

"I'm sorry," Natalia whispered.

"Natalia?" Calleigh asked more gently

"I never thought he would try to file against Jen, but once he did I was afraid he would destroy me, and her so I ran and I'm sorry I shouldn't have even called Jen that night," Natalia's voice was barely audible, I wanted to scream that standing up for herself wouldn't have hurt her and it would have helped JJ and if she hadn't called JJ she would probably be dead now, but I kept my calm.

"You and I both know that if JJ hadn't showed up it would have ended worse than it did Natalia. I know that I promised both you and JJ not to tell anyone what I found out about you and Nick, but Calleigh deserves to know why I just threatened to kill him, so I'm asking you to let me tell her everything," I asked Natalia knowing full well I would tell Calleigh no matter what I just wouldn't do it here if she said no.

"Go ahead," her voice cracked as she said it and I knew she was crying as she tried to hide behind me.

"Ok, Nick's her ex-husband," I begun, "three years ago he got mad over something and beat the shit out of her, she called a good friend of mine afraid he was going to kill her," I would have continued but the door to the firearms lab opened revealing the ME from the glades and JJ.

"Calleigh you know i love you sugar and I'm really glad to see you since everyone's been looking for you but my job description does not entail fetching feds for you," Alexx said.

"Well it doesn't include treating the living either but that's why I called finding the fed was just a plus," Calleigh replied.

"You again, why won't you go see a real doctor?" Alexx begun.

"Not me this time, I was hoping you could reset her shoulder," I cut her off indicating Natalia.

"Angel what happened?" Alexx asked coming closer.

"WHAT THE HELL EMILY I know you don't like her but seriously," JJ yelled at me I took a step back not expecting this at all.

"You know me better than that JJ," I snapped back as Calleigh stepped in front of me defensively.

"I thought I did but this is over the line," she yelled back crossing the room toward us.

"Back off," Calleigh stopped her.

"Nick's out of prison," I told her watching her reaction, I knew JJ well enough to know that the mask of nothing that suddenly crossed her face was her way of hiding her feelings, I also knew by the way that her fingers flick up to the cuff of her sleeve that she was angry.

"I'm sorry," Natalia whispered softly. I watched as JJ's anger seemed to vanish instantly as she looked as Natalia. I knew that Alex must have put her shoulder back while I wasn't paying attention to her because I could see tears in her eyes, but she was moving the arm slowly. That alone told me how high of a pain tolerance she must have had to have not made a sound thru the pain.

"Nat, It's not your fault," JJ cooed moving to Natalia and wrapping her in her arms.

"But it is Jen, I could have done something years ago but I was too weak an now I'm afraid again," Natalia sobbed clinging to JJ like she was the only thing keeping her from drowning. Alexx seemed to have vanished and I assumed she had went back to wherever we had summoned her from. I knew that Natalia was JJ's best friend but I had never expected that she would be so protective as to think even for a moment that I would hurt her.

"I'm never going to get a full explaination am I?" Calleigh whispered having snuck up behind me while I was watching the way that JJ treated Natalia.

"Can't I keep my air of mystery for just a little while longer?" I teased her because I couldn't really bring myself to explain all of Natalia's past right now.

"Come back home with me tonight? You can explain then, and maybe I can actually get to know somethings about you besides all of the terrible things that have happened to you," she offered sliding her hands around my waist.

"Tonight it is then, but first I do believe we have a murder to clear me of," I replied turning my focus back to JJ, "JJ is Clyde here yet?" I knew that she would know he was coming she had been watching over me ever since Doyle came back into the picture.

"He should be here by now, the team is downstairs they probably stopped him," She started before looking at me hesitantly, it was almost the same look she'd given me on the plane a year ago, "I didn't know how to tell them that had lied to them."

"JJ I'm sorry I put you in the middle of this you shouldn't have had to lie to them," I told her.

"You're not the only thing I've lied to them about lately," she whispered not looking at me. I had told her on the plane to Paris that she was wearing the look that I had invented of not trusting anyone, but now she just looked exhausted.

"JJ you know that you can tell me anything I have international clearance," I tried to get her to open up.

"Not anything, international clearance didn't get most people your file and some of the things I've done in the last year have been almost as well concealed as that," she looked at me then and I could see a look of desperation in her eyes.

"I told you then and I'm telling you again now you can tell me anything," I told her.

"Maybe but not right now," her answer was one of practiced diplomacy that reminded me of the ambassador.

"JJ don't hide behind diplomatic words, remember that I grew up in this world of half truths and fake smiles for cameras you can just tell me no," I hissed at her.

"Emily, I didn't mean it like that I just meant that we have more pressing things to talk about, like your new friend," she gave a pointed look to Calleigh, who I felt tense against me for a moment.

"How about we talk about you and Natalia rather than me and Calleigh," I snapped at her, putting my hands over Calleigh's on my stomach to reassure her that it was ok. I watched JJ's eyes flick to Natalia for a moment.

"You already know more about me and Nat than most people ever will, yes she's mine now," I watched half shocked as JJ pulled Natalia into her arm and began peppering her neck with kisses. Natalia seemed to press herself impossibly closer to JJ whimpering when JJ bit into her skin just above her collarbone, then just as suddenly as she had begun the show she stopped and looked at me again, "you're turn."

"Jesus I don't know if that is completely hot or terrifying," Calleigh whispered in my ear.

"JJ!" I exclaimed not sure what to do with what I had just seen, I'd known a long time ago that JJ cared for Natalia in a way that she cared for no one else, hell I'd even assumed that JJ probably like Natalia as more than a friend, but until now I had believed it to be one sided at best.

"Emily, I've never seen you let anyone protect you from anything, you loved the BAU like siblings and yet you wouldn't let them anywhere near Doyle and yet you let her protect you. I'm not blind Emily I see how you look at her, and more than that I see how she protects you so why don't you just tell me that you're dating her? Are you really that shy?" I felt myself blush because I knew she was right I wanted to date Calleigh, but the problem was that she didn't know that yet.

"Maybe because we haven't gotten to talk about this between us yet, just because I want to make her my girlfriend doesn't mean she'll say yes," Calleigh cut off our argument before suddenly pulling her arms back away from me, "I'm sorry," I turned to face her realizing that she was blushing.

"Calleigh?" I asked cautiously, since she was backing away from me.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to take advantage like this," she sounded hysterical, "god, what have I done, I'm sorry Em, I shouldn't have said that," I did the one thing that I knew would calm her down; I kissed her.


	9. The Girls with Secrets to Share

**A/N:** _sorry it took so long and is short_

After everything she'd done for me I had pushed her because I was angry, not even angry with her, I was angry with Nick for hurting Nat again, I was angry at the so called justice system I worked for, because they had let Nick out. I had thought that she wasn't telling me things, but really the truth was that she didn't know. I had just forced her to do something that I don't even know if she was comfortable with. I know that I didn't force her to kiss Calleigh, but I also know that she only did it because the lieutenant had been panicking. I felt Natalia pressing herself against me, I turned my attention back to her giving Emily the illusion of privacy.

"Jen," Nat whimpered squirming in my arms, I realized then just how possessive what I had just done had been. I went to let go of her, to give her her freedom, but she just pressed closer begging, "Jen don't let go, please."

"Nat what's wrong? What did I do?" I was worried now wondering why she sounded afraid what had I done to make her sound so small. I pulled as close as I could while still being careful of her shoulder.

"I...I don't want to belong to him anymore Jen, please don't pull away from me. I want to be yours Jen please," she whispered turning in my arms so she was facing me her face pressed to my neck.I could see red teeth marks on her neck and realized that maybe the bite had been a little too hard.

"Nat you don't have to belong to anyone you know," I told her gently.

"But, what if I want to? what if I want you to own me right now?" She hissed pressing herself down on my leg and I realized what she meant. She wanted me to fuck her, she'd told me she liked rough and now I know that Biting her turned her on. Shit!

"Not now love, tonight, when we're done here I'll come home with you ok?" I asked hoping against all odds reminding her of where we were would help with the situation and not make it worse.

I was saved from any more words by the door flying open with enough force that it made a crashing sound. Natalia jumped putting me between her and the door, I noticed Calleigh and Emily jump apart and knew by Emily's blush that she was embarrassed. I looked to the doorway to see Morgan, Reid, Rossi, Garcia, Hotch, Clyde, Tripp and Eric.

"Mrs. Jareau we asked you not to leave our sight," Tripp growled at me moving into the room.

"I'm sorry Tripp, I asked Alex to bring her up here, I didn't know," Calleigh stopped him coming to me.

"Calleigh, you're alive," he seemed relieved for a moment before, "If you had been around you would know that she most likely killed a man this morning and she has been following you."

"Who do you think she killed?" Calleigh asked looking at me with more interest now.

"A man named Ian Doyle was murdered at the docks this morning and we believe that either her or someone else that no one will tell me about killed him, since no one will tell me shit about this mystery person I'm inclined to believe it was her," Tripp hissed and I realized Ryan was the only one that knew why we were outside Calleigh's house and we had sent him to wait for Clyde at the airport which meant all the other Miami cops still thought I was a killer.

"Detective I told you Ian Doyle is not a victim and his murder is sanctioned," Clyde said calmly.

"She didn't kill Doyle I did," Emily spoke up, I watched as all eyes went to her Tripp, and Eric looked surprised but the team all looked like they had seen a ghost, which I guess they had. Hotch just looked at me I could tell he was surprised to see Emily.

"Emily, you didn't I did you don't have to protect me, I chose to take a sniper rifle and make sure that he died," Calleigh snapped.

"Calleigh?" Tripp asked turning on her.

"Everyone needs to sit down, this is going to be a very long explanation and I thinks it will be best if we just start from the beginning and work our way forward," Natalia started looking around the room.

"Where do you plan for us to sit you have no chairs?" Reid asked.

"Just sit on the counters, there shouldn't be any guns out," Calleigh said, I realized from what Nat had told me of the woman that this must be her firearms lab. Tripp and Delko followed her instruction as soon as she said it, the BAU took a little longer to do so.

"For those of you who either don't know me or don't remember me my name is Natalia Boa Vista I work here in the Miami crime lab, before I came to Miami I worked in Quantico's crime lab," Nat begun.

"You don't have to do this," I whispered to her.

"Yes I do," she replied before continuing to the room, "three years ago I made a mistake I called a friend when I was afraid and then I turned my back on her because I was afraid, she was lucky she had other friends, a better friend. Emily balled her out when I ran away, now it's time for me to take responsibility, no more lies, and no more hiding," she looked at me. I didn't know if she was asking permission or looking for support so I just nodded, "My ex-husband beat me." I heard her voice crack and somehow knew to open my arms because within half a second she was in my arms crying. I rubbed circles on her back trying to calm her down as best I could knowing how hard she had worked to hide this.

"If we're going in order of events I'm Emily Prentiss, I worked for the BAU until I died a year ago. before working for the BAU I worked for Interpol that profiled and infiltrated international criminals. I worked on a case then trying to apprehend a man code named Valhalla, who was an ex IRA weapons trafficker. I came up with a profile and set up a cover under which to meet him. I met with the man we shot this morning Ian Doyle, he didn't want to sell me guns, but he did want to date me. I thought that dating this man would get me closer to Valhalla so I said yes, turned out he was Valhalla. When we were alone or it was just us, his housekeeper and her son he was the perfect gentleman, but to everyone else he was a cold hardened cruel man. I used the knowledge I had of psychology to condition myself to be Lauren Reynolds so that nothing I did in my sleep would give me away. One day he told me that Declan, the housekeeper's son wasn't hers at all but his, eventually we took him down and staged the death of Lauren Reynolds, he went to an off book prison in Korea. I relocated his son and housekeeper to the US and left them out of the file, and I transferred to the BAU. About a three year in I got a call from Interpol saying that they couldn't break Doyle and did I have anything that could help them. I took Declan to a warehouse and told him we were going to play a game that he wasn't allowed to play with anyone but me. I staged his murder and even held a loaded gun to his head. It worked until I went to one of my mother's Gala's and was caught by a TV crew asking why I didn't come to society events anymore. Since I no longer did undercover work I told them I worked for the FBI and didn't have time," Emily begun. I was glad that Emily was going most of the explaining because I could feel Nat's tears soaking my shirt, and I knew she wouldn't want to be seen like this.

"So Emily Prentiss and Lauren Reynolds are the same person, and you're not dead?" Delko spoke up then.

"Correct," Emily threw in before continuing, "One of the guards apparently enjoyed watching international TV because Doyle saw the interview and made it his mission to get out and find me. He believed that I had been responsible for his son's 'death'. He wanted to kill my family in revenge for getting his son killed. He succeeded in getting out the BAu had become my family and I didn't want to put them in danger so when he came to me, I decided to go after him alone," I already knew this, but it didn't make it any easier to hear.

"Damn it Emily we can take care of ourselves if you would have been fucking honest we would have kept you safe!" Derek yelled at her, I could hear the anger in his voice but she stood her ground.

"Maybe you can Morgan but I didn't want to roll the dice! Not when I could do it myself," I was proud of Emily for yelling back, but I knew it was the wrong thing to say.

"Do it yourself? Really Emily last time I check you got branded, staked and you lost Doyle, that's not doing shit yourself, oh and you lied to us and let us believe you were dead!" he yelled back at her.

"Morgan, JJ and I made the decision not to tell the rest of the team that she was alive," Hotch stopped them arguing.

"You Knew!" Derek turned on me then.

"Yes I knew, and no I didn't tell you. I'm sorry for how I know you must feel but it was the right call since she's still alive," I told him.

"You think I would have gotten her killed?" He asked me.

"I didn't say that Derek," I replied realizing my mistake and knowing I shouldn't have spoken up at all.

"You think you can keep secrets better than I can?" he yelled and I felt Natalia flinch against me.

"Stop it Derek, I didn't say that either," I hissed but somewhere a small voice in my head was saying yes I can you don't know what I've done.

"Why JJ I thought I knew you now I don't know that I knew you at all," He hissed at me.

"JJ take Natalia and get out of here this is my mess and I'll clean it up, you don't need to be here for the explanation you already know everything" Emily said stepping between Derek and me. I was glad for the escape and even more glad to get Nat away from the yelling. As I slipped out the door I mouthed thank you at Emily knowing that she was doing me a favor.

"Jen will you take me home and make me yours?" Natalia asked softly once we were out of the firearms lab. I thought about it for a moment I should stay in the building and wait for Emily to calm everyone down but Nat's offer was so much more tempting.

"Alright but its on you if Tripp gets mad," I told her knowing full well that if Tripp got mad I wouldn't let him near her.

"Thank you Jen I promise I'll be good," she whispered clinging to me as we walked.

"Hey Nat you don't have to do that with me," I told her.

"What?" she asked shyly.

"Act like I'll hurt you, I won't Nat if you want to be mine you can be but I won't hurt you," I told her gently.

"Jen I know you won't hurt me unless I ask you too, but I can't break all of the habits that Nick forced me into," She whispered and I relaxed knowing that is she was willing to admit it than we were making progress. I led her out of the building and to her car.


End file.
